


A Winter Kind of Morning

by thegreenfairy246



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Choking, Comfort, F/M, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-08
Updated: 2018-07-08
Packaged: 2019-06-07 08:33:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15215204
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thegreenfairy246/pseuds/thegreenfairy246
Summary: Hi y'all! If you like my work, you can follow me on Tumblr@strawberrybucky





	A Winter Kind of Morning

The metal hand clasped around your throat was not a familiar feeling. Sure, you and Bucky had gotten a little kinky on occasion, but he had never been actively trying to squeeze the life out of you. And besides, you were used to the metal hands touch. The way he caressed your side or the feeling of his fingers slotting together with yours. Never before had it's rage been pointed at you. So, needless to say you were a little shocked when you woke up to Bucky squeezing your throat against the mattress. You attempted to wheeze out Bucky’s name, but his grip was far too tight. Instead, you settled for clawing uselessly against his forearm. This wasn't the worst way to die you supposed. You loved Bucky after all. 

Just as your head started to get fuzzy, you heard a crash. You tried to look towards the sound, but you were already fading.

When you woke up, you saw the unforgiving lights of the infirmary. You tried to sit up, but your head was too heavy.

“Hey hey wait.” Came a disembodied voice to your left, you put two and two together only when Natasha’s head came into your line of sight. “Let me help you.” Your bed creaked to life and positioned you upright.

You croaked out, “W-what hap-pened?”

Nat winced and you knew it wasn't good. “Well. Bucky woke up as the Winter Soldier. He went after the first target he saw which, unfortunately, happened to be you.” 

It all came together then. The choking you'd received that morning. Had it been that morning? You realized you had no concept of how long you'd been out, so you asked Natasha.

“Only a few hours. They gave you a sedative after they made sure you weren't injured in the hope you'd get some rest.”

“Oh. That makes sense.” Another question came to your mind, “How did I get down here?”

Natasha smiled, “Friday realized something was up, so she sent alarms to Steve's room and he got me up on his way there.” She chuckled, “Took a hell of a lot of work to get him knocked out, let me just tell you.”

You laughed, “I can imagine. But thank you Nat.”

She leaned forward and took your hand, “Of course. Nothing could have kept me away.”

A little while later, Dr. Cho cleared you to leave. Natasha helped you up to your room. She paraded you around the living room to show everyone you were alive and well, then promptly ushered you to your bed. You noticed one person decidedly absent at the welcome back fest. Bucky. As Nat shoved, yet another, pillow under your head you asked her, “Um Nat? Why'd you take me to my old room? And where's Bucky?”

It took her a long minute to answer so you said, “Nat?”

“He hasn't come out of his room since...well you know.”

“And has anybody gone to check on him?”

“Steve tried, but he wouldn't let him in.”

You made to get up, but Nat stopped you. “Y/N stop. Friday would tell us if be was hurt. You can go check on him when you get some sleep.”

“Fine. But as soon as I wake up, I'm going.”

“I would expect nothing less.”

When she left, you tried to go to sleep. You really did. When counting sheep proved ineffective, you decided to make some tea. On the way down the hall to the tower’s kitchen you passed the room you usually shared with Bucky. As you walked by, you heard quiet sobbing. You had never been able to stand it when Bucky cried, so you knocked on the door.

"Bucky? Are you okay?"

"Yeah, Y/N. I'm fine. Go back to bed.” Bucky replied, but you could hear the tremble in his voice.

"Can I come in?"

"Yeah. Sure."

You walked in on a heartbreaking scene; Bucky, sitting on the floor by the bed, head against his knees, shaking with sobs. As you went to sit next to him, you noticed the scratches on his arm and winced. He quickly rose to his feet and moved away. You could pinpoint the exact moment he noticed the bruises on your throat.

"No, Y/N. It's better if you stay away from me." Bucky cried.

"What? Why?" you asked.

"I'm a monster."

"Bucky, what are you talking about?"

"You are such a great person and if you get too close to me...I-I'll ruin you."

"Bucky, you do realize it's a little too late for this speech?"

“Yes! Because I choked you! I should have done this a long time ago!” 

You could tell the tears streaming down your cheeks.

“Bucky, you don't mean that.” You whispered. “You can't do this because I'm already far too close to you.” 

“That was my mistake. Just the- the nightmares, they went away when I was with you. And I didn't feel so weird going out in public. I just, I just got too attached. And I'm sorry. But you can go, I'll be fine.” He wiped the tears away from his eyes, and tried to send you a smile. You saw right through it. You walked towards him and threw your arms around his neck.

“Bucky, what happened this morning was not your fault. The Winter Soldier is in your mind and you can't help that. But we'll get it out. We'll figure out how to get rid of it. I promise. You can't start pushing me away.” You pulled back to look at him. “Because we need each other. And I have no idea what I would do without you.”

“Y/N…”

“You know I'm right Bucky.”

"What if something happens to you?"

"I'll be okay. Even if something did happen, it wouldn't be your fault. I'm not going anywhere."

"Promise?"

"I promise Bucky. Wanna try and get some sleep?"

Instead of replying, Bucky just climbed into bed. 

You leaned down to kiss his forehead, "G'night Bucky."

You went to leave but you felt a strong hand on your wrist.

"Y/N, would you stay with me?"

You smiled, "Of course."

You crawled into bed next to him and curled against his side. Right before you fell asleep you heard him whisper, "I love you Y/N. So much more than you could ever know." And with that you let Bucky's heartbeat lull you to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Hi y'all! If you like my work, you can follow me on Tumblr @strawberrybucky


End file.
